The Most Difficult Question

Probably the most difficult question I ever get asked is, "What's it like being transgender?" I guess that's about like me asking, "What's it like not being transgender?" So let me try to not answer the question.

Suppose, like Kermit the Frog, you were born green ("It's Not Easy Being Green"). And suppose all your life everyone around you, especially those you look up to (like parents or teachers) tell you that how you feel, that is green, is wrong. You have to feel pink.

No matter how hard you try, even painting yourself pink, you still feel green. Underneath all that paint, there is a deep, dark secret. If you let anyone know you were born green, they will go running away, screaming about the freak. So you hide it. And because you're hiding that secret, it's hard to make friends out of fear of exposure.

So finally you wake up one day and realize that if it's wrong to feel green, then there's no point in going on. It's time to end it.

Yes, many, if not all, of us reach that point. Far too many actually do it. And worse, that predisposes us to think those thoughts when other bad things happen in our lives.

Many people consider us as less than human, so it's okay for us to end it that way. Yes, that is exactly how many of us are treated. That's how the law treats us in most states and countries. That's how many religions treat us. Undeserving of even basic human rights and respect, we might as well put ourselves out of their misery.

And let's not forget that if everyone does it, then it must be the right thing to do.