Nancy Wichmann

So you just got out of the shower and you’re ready to shave, right? Wrong! Men don’t have a clue how to shave.

Sure, your beard may still be wet, but your pores aren’t open enough for what I call the “makeup shave.” Now, if you’re going out in drab, go right ahead and shave the way you always have (the “man shave”). But if you’re going out en femme (I hate that term, but it’s useful here), then you need to learn the makeup shave.

Remember the old-timey barbershop shaves? What was the first thing the barber did? He wrapped a steaming hot towel around the guy’s face. That not only wets the whiskers, but also opens the pores so the hairs can be pulled out more easily and smoothly. This is especially important for your makeup shave.

Soak a hot washcloth in water that’s as hot as you can stand it. Wring it out so it doesn’t drip water all over the place (neatness counts, girls!). Just remember that it's the water that's hot, not the cloth, so don't wring it dry. Place it over as much of your beard area as you can (I find holding it diagonally works for me) and hold it there until it cools down slightly. Do it at least one more time.

Now, quickly apply shaving cream all over your beard, and a little beyond. You should probably consider a woman’s shave cream (or gel) that’s designed for the legs because they tend to have better lubricating properties. This keeps the beard moist, but speed is still important because those pores are already beginning to close up again. You may also learn to reduce the amount of shave cream - most people use too much.

Do you ever watch "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy?" The one who does the grooming is always emphatically telling guys that "the best thing about disposable razors is that they’re disposable." He then throws them all away. You need to do the same. Get a good razor – I find that heavier ones, for some reason, do a better job. I also like more than two blades in them. Frankly, I think vibrating razors are just a gimmick, but the battery inside does make them heavier. (Okay, I have found from my legs that they may reduce irritation a little.)

Start by shaving with the grain in small sections, rinsing the razor frequently to avoid clogging it. This is because this first pass will get at least 80% of the hair and help pull it from the skin. Then go back over it across the grain, then against the grain. Don’t forget that little, hard-to-reach area under your nose.

Rub your hand across your face in all directions. Undoubtedly, you will locate some additional stubble. Shave again in the direction your hand found it. Keep going as long as you keep feeling stubble. Yes, you will get razor-burn; live with it, honey!

All done? Now, rinse your washcloth in pure cold water – it’s time to close those pores back up. Make sure you get all the leftover shave cream.

Pat your face dry. Finally apply a moisturizer over the entire shaved area. Uh, oh, that stings doesn’t it? Okay, I cheat here; I use Solarcaine. Not only does it moisturize, but it also is an antiseptic and anesthetic, so it helps guard against infection and relieves the pain a bit.

Now you can think about makeup, but you should give your skin a few minutes to relax first. Grab a cup of coffee or have a cigarette.